Pray for Malaysia

Ten years ago this month, I quit my job with government-owned oil and gas company and joined an international company in the city. Many who quit their job around that time left Malaysia and went to oil rich countries in the Middle East. Back then, oil price was almost USD80 per barrel and rising. Many jobs were offered to experienced Malaysians who were prepared to pack up and go overseas. Ringgit was stable and jobs for the oil and gas industry were aplenty.

Now the tide has turned. Oil is still trading above USD40 but many oil and gas related companies are going through some sort of restructuring. A time for soul searching after a decade of industry euphoria that has abruptly stopped over the one last year when oil price took a plunge. The company I work for is not excluded. Its footprint in this country is shrinking and despite being one of the biggest energy companies in the world, many local employees feel like it is quitting this country. We have been told that our jobs now hang in the balance. We have to face a stark reality. A multinational energy giant has no loyalty to any particular country; it goes where its shareholder's values can be maximised regardless of how long it's been in a particular country.

The ringgit has breached the psychological level of RM4 for every US dollar. Economists can point to many factors for the ringgit's decline but what most people like me can relate to are the low oil price and the current political stalemate in the country. The government has been embroiled in a massive financial scandal and after decades of weakening democratic institutions, our check and balance system is now so damaged that it does not seem to be able correct the situation. I hear noises everywhere I go. In the mosque, the surau, the cafe, the office and even more so in Cyberspace. You almost hear nothing online these days but curse. How nice would it be if we could just leave this country, work for a stronger currency and not paying tax to a regime which waste our tax money on expensive lifestyle of our leaders.  Every day, I hear depressing talk of how bad we fare compared to our neighbouring countries. The noises remind me of the chaos of 1998 all over again.

I realise it is August, the Merdeka month. The Raya celebration has not even ended yet. I should be saying all things positive and patriotic. But instead all I am hearing and reading is the opposite. I wish I could turn a blind eye and pretend this is not happening. The only positive news I read is from Utusan and TV3, but I don’t read and trust them that much. May be I should be an ostrich, bury my head in the sand, watch TV3 more and read Utusan to lift my spirit. Yet, after all that happened in the last few weeks, it is hard to light up the Merdeka spirit this August.  Even less so when I could potentially lose my job after the company re-organisation. My wallet is hurting and my love for this country is really being tested.

When I think about it again, may be I should have followed my friends who left our shores to work overseas 10 years ago. I would have earned tons of money and have nothing to do with supporting extravagant lifestyle of people in power and the nonsense that is happening in this country. I don't feel like hearing patriotic songs anymore. It is so hypocritical of our delusional leaders to force the rakyat to sing it over and over again.  It feels like my patriotism is being robbed by them to keep themselves in power. Perhaps, we should follow our former future prime minister’s advice to those going to Mekah. Instead of singing Merdeka songs, we all should just go to our respective house of worship and pray to God that Malaysia will survive this difficult time. God save me. God save Malaysia!

Hari Ini Dalam Sejarah

Five years ago today, in 2010, I arrived in this town to take up my current position. Little did I know back then that I would be staying for 5 years. My purpose of coming here back then was to gain some field experience of doing my job. This is where oil and gas activities take place and I have to be here to learn the operational side of it. All this while, I had been doing desk job since I started working around 20 years ago in research and consultancy. I thought I wanted to gain some field experience for a few years and then back to my home again in the Peninsular. But as for other things in my life, I do not have a long term plan and I take things as they come.

When I first arrived here I was alone, going back to my home once in a fortnight. I was staying with a friend who was also a weekend husband. But long distance family is not good for the long term. I decided to bring my whole family to this town. I was joined by them 15 months later and my life was normal again. Over the five years I have seen changes to this town. Materially, I'd say towards the better. More shopping malls and more happening now than 5 years ago. More shopping malls were built than is necessary for such a small city, but they are mainly to cater for our neighbours from accross the border whose money has increased in value due to the ringgit's depreciation. Things here are more expensive than in many places in Malaysia, especially so for the locals who earn so little. With the depressed wages due to cheap foreign labour, I think the locals are struggling to make ends meet. For us professionals, things are not that bad. One thing, traffic is much better here. It only takes 10 minutes to go to work and same length of time to go home in the evening. No stress to look for parking space and no toll booth to pass through. I can spend more time with my family and overall the quality of life is better.

I think I am living in the best possible area for me and my family in this town. My kids just walk to school as my house share fence with their school. I live about 100 meters from a mosque and it's only a short walk to grocery shops and local supermarket. My kid's tuition centre is also just across the main road. This is indeed a very good place to live. Everything is just a few blocks away. But even after 5 years I have not been able to embrace this place as my new home. At the back of my mind, this is a necessary sojourn and it has to be brief. Whether 5 years is brief is a matter of opinion. I imagine loving a place is like loving a partner. I love my wife that I cannot think of another woman in my life. I cannot love two women at the same time. Same thing goes to loving a place. A few times a year, during business trip to KL, I make a point to visit my home there so that I still reconnect with my home and maintain the sense of belonging there. I have to decide whether to stay longer and risk falling in love with this place or going back to the town in Peninsular, where I still have a place which I call home. Indeed, there is no place like home.

Ulasan Buku: "Aku Kafir, Kau Siapa?" - Ooi Kok Hin

Aku malas membaca apalagi kalau buku itu tebal dan 'berat'. Bukan berat di tangan tapi berat di kepala. Tapi aku juga bukan penggemar novel picisan yang menghiasi senarai bestseller kedai-kedai buku popular.

Pagi tadi aku ronda-ronda di Bandar Ilmu. Hidup tanpa kereta macam patah kaki. Paksa diri menapak dua tiga bangunan dari tempat aku menginap. Pusing keliling bangunan, ingat nak masuk shopping, tapi pasaraya masih belum buka. Terlalu awal untuk berniaga walaupun memang peniaga rata-rata tamak laba. Nampak kedai buku aku cuba jenguk. Berlainan sekali dari yang lain. Semua buku dalam bahasa kebangsaan dengan genre dan gaya bahasa yang pelbagai. Ada yang dikarang dalam bahasa sastera tinggi dan ada juga guna bahasa separuh mencarut. Tapi tak mengapa. Misinya bukan memertabatkan bahasa. Menggunakan akronim yang sama dengan Dewan Bahasa dan Pustaka (DBP), penerbit DuBook Press dengan nada sindiran berkata mereka menerbitkan buku kerana kecewa dengan DBP yang buku-bukunya hidup segan mati tak mahu. Sebaliknya, agenda mereka adalah agenda perut. Terus terang mereka jelaskan bahawa misi mereka nak buat duit, bukan agensi mengangkat bahasa kebangsaan. Tiada bantuan kerajaan, hanya initiatif anak muda untuk cari makan.
Menariknya, aku juga nampak kedai buku Dewan Bahasa dan Pustaka (DBP) di blok seberang jalan tapi masih belum buka.

Berdasarkan tinjauan ringkas aku di kedai kecil itu mereka cuba menghidangkan sesuatu untuk memenuhi selera anak muda dan budak-budak indie yang selalu mengomen di alam siber. Penulis-penulis mereka dari generasi anak aku. Tiada nama penulis besar. Mengikut penerbitnya semua orang dialu-alukan untuk menjadi penulisnya. Tukang sapu, cikgu sekolah rendah, drebar bas sekolah, dan mat rempit sekalipun boleh menghantar manuskrip mereka untuk dipertimbangkan.

Tertarik dengan judul buku yang catchy "Aku Kafir, kau siapa?" oleh Ooi Kok Hin, aku membaca beberapa helaian di bahagian depan, tengah dan kulit belakang. Aku terus beli. Ringan harga, ringan dibawa dan santai dibaca walaupun isu yang dibincangkan adalah serius dan relevant dengan masyarakat majmuk Malaysia hari ini. Penulis adalah neutral agama (agnostik) walaupun isu agama dibincang di merata tempat dalam esei-esei yang dibahagikan dalam 3 kategori - Pendidikan, Agama dan Kebebasan, Politik.

Di bahagian Pendidikan, umumnya penulis meluahkan perasaan tertindas kaum Cina di Malaysia dengan sistem pendidikan negara. Baginya tidak adil sekolah vernikular dimansuhkan jika sekolah agama masih wujud dan sekolah kebangsaan makin bertambah Islamik. Kaum bukan Muslim tidak gemar ke sekolah kebangsaan kerana kualitinya merosot dan terlalu Malay centric. Penulis mengalami zaman persekolahan yang berbeza dari kebanyakan rakan sekaumnya kerana belajar di sekolah kebangsaan, kemudian Penang Free School dan kemudian kolej matrikulasi. Penulis bergaul dengan rakan sekelas Melayu dan India semasa di sekolah. Penulis menyertai kumpulan anak-anak muda yang membentuk kumpulan Universiti Terbuka Anak Muda (UTAM). Kumpulan ini menegaskan bahawa sekolah tidak harus menjadi penjara kreativiti dan universiti bukan kilang. Produk yang dihasilkan bukan robot atau ayam daging yang digemukkan sementara menunggu hari untuk disembelih dan dinikmati dagingnya.

Di peringkat tinggi, penulis berpendapat bahawa kebebasan berkarya di universiti termasuk penglibatan dalam politik harus dibenarkan supaya mahasiswa dekat dengan isu masyarakat luar dan bertindak menyuarakan isu rakyat kepada pemerintah.Pelajar juga perlu ambil tahu tentang politik walaupun bukan semua bercita-cita jadi ahli politik. Politik adalah kehidupan dan ia boleh mempengaruhi banyak hal di sekeliling kita.

Di dalam bahagian Agama, penulis yang agnostik ini menyokong liberalisme dan kebebasan beragama. Isu hukum hudud dan campur tangan agama dalam politik turut disentuh termasuk beberapa sketsa satira dengan watak-watak fiksional ahli politik tanahair berbual dan berhujah dengan ahli falsafah purba Socrates dan Plato.

Mungkin inilah buku yang pertama dalam sejarah yang aku baca dari kulit depan ke kulit belakang dalam masa satu hari. Kalau anda berminat dengan isu-isu masyarakat majmuk Malaysia tempias politik tak dapat dielak sebab politik melibatkan kuasa membuat dasar. Jika kita tak pedulikan politik bermakna kita tak kisah orang politik tentukan nasib dan masa depan kita. Kalau ramai orang cerdik menghindari politik, kita akan dapat pemimpin yang bangang. Dan pemimpin yang cetek akal akan mengambil orang bodoh sebagai pak turut. Yang cerdik dan pandai berhujah dengan mereka akan dihumban dalam penjara atau mereka sendiri yang memilih untuk berhijrah ke luar negara. Jadi kalau anda rasa loya dengan novel-novel Melayu popular dengan cerita CEO Melayu berusia 20an yang banyak bergelumang dengan cinta, hasad dengki dan syok sendiri dari bercakap soal bisnes, ayuh baca buku terbitan syarikat ini. Pada saya buku ini berjaya membawa beberapa isu berat dengan gaya bahasa ringan, tidak terlalu akademik dan sesuai dibaca untuk relaks minda.

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